TK1 Blog From Angela – Rules, Chores, & Responsibilities

After reading the article that Tony and Kris put on their website about spoiled kids, I had to write this. Kids have things easier than we did growing up. Plain and simple, we want it that way, but I believe we have responsibility, as parents, to bring them up with a sense of responsibility and self worth. Every parent is different and I definitely don’t claim to be perfect, but there are certain things that are simply non-negotiable in my world. Here’s what works for us…

Bedtime is 8 p.m. Everyday. If you are 15 or if you are 6, the rule is the same. You may not go to sleep that early, but this is the time you retreat to your bedroom and unwind.
Everyone is up by 8 a.m. There are things to be done. Being lazy isn’t an option.
We run on a schedule everyday. It is clearly posted on the refrigerator. Everyone knows what is expected so there is no question.
Everyone has chores, and those chores change each week. Chores are not done to earn an allowance. They are done as teamwork. We are a family and we work together.
Respect is a MUST!
Breakfast, lunch, and supper are family time. No electronic devices allowed. If it rings, you best not answer it. We eat around a table, not in front of a television.
Internet use is not a given. It is a privilege and is monitored.
Television is limited to 2 hours a day. We were all given a brain for a reason. Use it!
Leave any place that you visit better than you found it. (This is especially important when we go to our local school and use their track or ball field. Ten minutes before time to leave, everyone takes time to pick up the trash.)
Help others that need it and expect nothing in return.
Life is all about choices…with choices, there are either rewards or consequences…
And, most importantly, hugs are important and you can never overuse “I love you”.

I have been criticized by many because we have “rules” and we enforce them, but it’s not all bad. I know that, for the most part, when my kids are away from me, they are well behaved and respectful. I can’t be with them 24/7, so it is important that they know what is expected of them.

I had a teenager visit my home a few months ago and he clearly didn’t like what was expected of him at our house. He commented that he was friends with his parents and they didn’t have rules, chores, and such. That is fine, if it works for them. It is not my responsibility to be a friend to my kids, I am supposed to be their parent and teach them a foundation of morals and responsibilities that they can grow from as adults. I want to be able to send my son off to college and know that he can cook a meal, balance a checkbook, clean up after himself, sew on a button, and simply be comfortable out there in the real world.

And, yes, my kids are allowed to have fun…”Work hard, play harder” is a good motto and, at the end of the day, everyone can feel good about what they accomplished. That’s never a bad thing!

Until next time…